I hear a lot of good and endearing things from men. I really do love men as a species. Yes species. They are so amazing as creatures. So complex and beautiful. I remember as a child growing up with majority boys I used to want to be one. I mean things seemed easier for them. They got to pee standing up without even needing tissue (I may have tried it several times), they were tough, people didn't seem to expect them not to get hurt or scarred up or even say things like "you are way too pretty to be climbing trees like a lil boy". It just seemed to be the life. Then when I got older and began having sex that seemed way more simple too. It seemed that they could freely have sex with women, not care about them get the sexual pleasure they desired from them and cleanly move on. As a matter of fact the more sexual conquest the better. But not women....no we need to be ladies, we have so many rules. Now just to clarify I believe that women hold an extra responsibility to be aware of ourselves. To understand what it means to be a lady and to be a support. Like a back bone, I always look at it like the man as the head and the woman is the back bone, the body is a mutual thing but mostly it is control by the brain (the head). Women are natural supporters therefore we cannot just give away all that we are and spread it too thin because the burden could become too much. Anyway, I think that the idea that a woman is unable or unwilling to have unattached sexual relationships is not accurate. I mean just on a biological level it makes sense that we would want a mate for the rearing of the children but studies show that women begin to feel that the male presence is obsolete for the most part after the children turn four. My point is we like sex, can have it freely with some people without being this emotionally attached ball of stress. But I think that as a whole we all need to be careful with our use of sex too freely. I am a very sexual creature, I like it A LOT and have been told that I am a "nymphomaniac" on more than one occasion. So I want to know the balance. I personally feel that if you are single (meaning not in a relationship where the two of you have made an agreement to be with one another and no one else) you should be able to explore any options that are pertinent to you as an individual, be that sexual or platonic.
I am prompted to discuss this issue due to the fact that I am recently single after 10 years of being with someone that I was very faithful to. I would have never stepped outside of our relationship and didn't do things such as club, run around with my male friends or put myself in situations that may entice individuals of the opposite sex. Now that I am single it seems that people tend to form all kinds of opinions about what I should or should not do. Mainly people who know me (even though the relationships aren't genuine for a variety of reasons). Speaking with my children's father seems to put things into perspective for me as far as how males look at females. Our relationship is developing a good flow therefore we speak more candidly with one another. He began telling me that men only want one thing and will do anything to get it. I replied that maybe I want only one thing and since I do not have to go through so much to get it I feel open enough to make those decisions for myself. I just really feel that I can decide to have a young fervent lover for just that reason, he is young and able to be.....well ;-). But maybe I want an older more experienced lover, one who is able to bring the years of fortitude to me when we are engaged in our actions. No matter my choices I feel my obligation is to always be honest with myself and my partners and be able to accept when something has just "run its course."
SN: I do have feelings and have gotten them caught up in the mix of this mess but that seems to be common with both males and females so that doesn't isolate females as the ones that can't handle the encounters.